Chronicles of an Extraordinary Fool

ts been a few months since i have felt any infatuation  since i have felt that yes .. i am in love .. its quiet sad .. that it takes that feeling to think enough to write my own thoughts... aaj mann hai phir kisi k pyaar mein padne ki, aaj zaroorat hai phir kisi k liye dil leke girne ki.  woh zehr peena hai phir ek baar..   woh yaar laado phir se mujhe pyaar,  woh aankhe jinme saari kaynaat dikh jaye , woh muskurahat jisme hum mit jaye,  dard bhi hai hazaaron ki koi hai nahi, sukoon ka katraa toh mijaye,  kya sochti hai yeh soch ki galiyaan .. kyun lagti nahi pyari ab phoolon ki kaliyan..., aaj rukh mud jataa hai un gum ke bazaaron ko, kabhi dil cheekhta hai  pukaarta hai dil k khareedaron ko .. kehte hai dil-on k dukaandaar bohot hai  kehte hai dil-on k sahukaar bohot hai .. bas naaseeb uss ek raqeeb ko dhoonta hai  jo baant sake ye dard kuch aur kataaron ko  and i choose to contradict that i require any infatuation

its been quite some time since something struck this head of mine ..and  thought i should express this one thought that has been just strolling in my extremely excited brain it started about 4 days back . its is pretty humane to feel a rush of excitement and i am quite human so i get excited a lot . I remember that when i was a kid we used to travel to Punjab in trains and no matter how bad the ride was gonna be (i ended up sick after most of em ) but i was never able to sleep the night before the journey . The path was always the same old monotonous one and so was the interior but, it never thwarted that excitement . Gradually i became older and lost this excitement . There are always some feelings in life which are forgotten because they get suppressed to extreme . Exempli gratia that feeling of enjoying a lolly pop .. how many of you readers remember it ... ?                                #Gotcha ...  anyways so coming back to the topic at hand "

heyo  how are you guys   so this one is regarding my recent activity ... i posted an idiotic status just for fun and got i dont know what kind of replies .. well let me bore you from the beginning  ..  it was a really pleasant Thursday morning .. the sky was just white .. patched with grey clouds .. you just know how that weather makes you feel ..makes every breath so fresh to inhale .. makes ever gush of wind all the more special and you just open your arms, the smile that it puts on your face , the jump it let's in in your dull pace ...   you just wanna shout out loud .. no matter who hears it ... the feeling is downright amazing  well i was in the middle of when the mischief stuck my mind ..  i just wanted to say that " i wanna fall in love" the follow up was only a joke .. but it was that day when i realized then, that only friends understand .. the rest will always misunderstand ... Bhavul took it right .. he understood then and there that

heyo ... Perhaps i was wrong ... maybe this need to write just doesnt thrive on the feeling of love or any such problem ... its just the feeling of being that makes me write these notes ... so been sometime since i have been told by an astrologer that i will be sensitive (emotionally) for 10 years , long time .. well 2010 was the beginning of it and 2020 will be the supposed end of it .. so been thinking on how can i become emotional all of a sudden .. and then it hit me .. i have been writing since 2010 only , been noticing little details since then only ..  so conclusion i twisted something in order to fit something ... but yea while the topic is at hand i suddenly lack empathy for others and started taking care of my own self ..  i supposedly won "the most compassionate Mira-ite" award (i saw the name on the trophy just a few weeks back and got it that it was a title given to me only .. although i have no memory of getting it ).. so that com

here are moments in one's life when they get to choose...  like to choose if they want a bicycle or a video game , choose whether to ask for a basket ball or a football , choose if a mobile would be better or a computer ..  Life is an endless chain of choices ..  choices that we make and choices that are imposed on us .  I wanna know which one makes you more happier . the one that you made yourself or the one that was imposed on you . I have never been in such a dilemma and never planned to be in any in my near future ... but   guess the near future boat has sailed and i guess its abt time i choose ... scratched my head all night .. guess i have been discouraged in every aspect of life, been questioned at every step of life so much that my ability to make decisions has been stripped off of me  ...Im sure everyone wants whats best for me but i guess im now a being who thrives on decisions made by others . The stark desire to end this life came over last night .

heyo ppl... guess i have ran out of stories .. .. but no matter .. got something to say .. , i want something to be shared , want something to be heard .. Its quite surprising to me .. but yes .. i want it all to happen again ... to go back to the childhood , to feel the rain ... to shout out a friends name, standing under the burning sun  and calling him out to play , that "red letter", that game of "cricket", the stupid "hide and seek", the tiring game of "tag" . go back into the time where .. i did not differenciate .. neither caste nor religon , when love was another "yucky" something and friendship was all that i knew.. a time when my lunch was eaten by my former friends before i had a chance at it.. would love to jump in the puddle again , would love a game of basket ball again, would love to love again ... alas time has its on repurcussions .. all the love stories i have ever had were meaning less and it kept ha

i know i shouldn't be posting this but i guess its about time i do let it out .. after all we have to let go if we need to move on . so here is the juice .. i met .. oh sorry " saw " this magnificent creature on 8th of august 2011...  it " wasn't " a love at first sight.. believe me... because back then she was holding back but  yea she looked beautiful in her own way .. the kind whose presence would be an overwhelming calm,  whose presence would be teamed with serenity .. it was amazing because  i kept looking back at her she sat in my ENG 123 second row and 4th seat..  hair tied back into a bun and looking at our teacher as he was asking for introductions..   well that was my highlight of the day ..  first day of college came down to second on the list ..  first was seeing her . Now people usually go crazy about love of their life ( at that particular time ) and, i was crazy too messaging her on facebook now and then .  I felt back

heyo ..    Well i was troubled and gave it a tad too much thought but it is truly said that  "An empty mind is devil's workshop" been some days since i have been craving the need to meet a friend.. but  i have been suppressing it  and im not sure if that is a reason to my current situation .  So it was recently brought to my notice that the music we like at a certain timeline is basically  because the music provides us with the emotional stimulus that our brain requires . I commented so on a teacher's status and got a reply " hmm" . Now, i don't know if that was a  yes or maybe .. but i know that it wasn't a no. so i have been listening to music  love songs, dub-step, rock and metal :P and god know what ...!!  but anyways here is the psychoanalysis  i think i am getting aggressive .. i feel like angry all the time and as i have been pointed out by my dad   i seem to be restless and impulsive any guess what could be the reason ..

m in a certain upheaval.. two girls i have know for a year ,  were bestest (oh yea bestest is now a word) of friends . you know the kind you  always imagine in a pair , the kind who will always laugh together , cry together  (hope it never happens) the one pair to joke together and the one pair to work together ...   like socks (weird analogy ... lemme try again) .. a keyboard ..  now with the keyboard you just assumed the mouse yourself didnt you ..  Thats the kind of friends they are. We being humans always have a tendency to create differences ..  we have never heard of a son who never fought with his mom ,  a daughter who never complained to her dad ,  a brother who doesnt defy his sister or brother. We have believed that we get to chose our friends but there is always a time when we reach an impasse with those FRIEND(s) and it is inevitable that we eventually lose em . why do we let such a thing happen .. because the other one doesnt wanna stick to us. we are

heyo readers (sometimes i feel like i should write "dear diary" :P :D ) Anyways so here is the deal, been on this thought since last two days and  cant seem to reach its end because every time i think of ending this  something new just knocks on my skull and shouts " you are not done yet ".  So, what happened was that i was thinking on this particular matter and something old  came to me ..  you know how we just love being with our best friends , call them to meet up ,  turn to them for help, ask them for a party coz we managed to pass in a subject with 2 marks.  But, many a times we feel that maybe our best friend doesn't wanna talk to us maybe he/she  grew tired of us and then we start showering the calls , msgs, gifts .. and stuff  just so you can get that one friend back.  This is something i cant understand that why do we act like a underdeveloped imbecile coz we who are capable of change, run after things we cant get .  so, why c

heyo readers ,  so get this .. isnt it universal that when you want something you cant find it and if you "dont want it" it is always there . The most idiotic of things happened 2 days back .. now i dont know is someone was playing me or its was real  but i guess it worked regardless .  i was at a certain place for a period of a year or so.. and came across someone.. you all know how the story turns filmy when you are in love but i will stick to infatuation since love is still a hard word to come by .  Now that particular someone was (dont read it is all the same lovey-dovey.. mushy stuff) beautiful enough to  make me go to that place every time and everyday, the idea of pouring my heart out seemed senseless at that particular time. During that particular time i would actually kill someone in order to see that smile.. but i couldnt give mine ..i guess i wanted to stay there to see her smile (selfish lol ).  So, back on track, all the time at that one particular place i could