Chronicles of an Extraordinary Fool

The following Except is a Monologue It was last night i wanted to ask her to block me but, a friend offered her ear to me and asked for me to talk. [00:22, 4/17/2018] : the longing makes you susceptible to bad decisions, the need alone to talk to her is such a hopelessly and helplessly weak and gut wrenching feeling that, the mind wouldn't stay with you, wandering off in the very thoughts you once relished and cherished, they become the sand papers wearing off the sharpness you held intact with the illusion that you need no love. [00:27, 4/17/2018] : If that isnt enough to destroy the kid that, held tightly to the dreams and fairy tales of a happy ending and a blissful life then, there is the presence, the advent of technology, keeps you at a certain end of a perpetual reminder that the person you wish to drive your mind away from has uploaded a new photo, a story, a status and that alone is enough for a demented retard like me to scroll through her words, those pixels that form...

So, it was last night that I got talking to the girl I had fallen for, 4 years back. We got to talking and i learned that she no longer has a boyfriend anymore and I was as happy as a toddler because it was first time in 4 years that i had learned that she was single and i did not think twice and offered her to take me back.  (yea, you are thinking right, what kind of fool just jumps at an opportunity like that, I could have waited a bit, could have asked if she was available, hell could have asked how did it happen and then move on from it but no, I didnt have that much thought and I just asked her straight away.) It is after her initial tipsy reply that I first felt it. During her acknowledgement of how special I was to her, she used that infernal word, that one word which was enough to tell me to quit dreaming. She used the word "always" I knew it then and there that she was lost to me. given the fact that I pushed her away in the first place. It was after asking her to...

Today I had an unusual air of calm inside my lungs. Today I was in no hurry to get up and go to work, I knew that sleeping in 30 minutes more wont hurt anybody, I walked to the Metro train station in a long 10 minute walk (it takes me precisely 7 minutes to get to the station from my home) and i was fine, not put of breath in any way, I was subjected to the same unrelenting crowd of rajiv chowk and I didnt care. In the metro I didnt offer my seat to any (coz no one aged nor any woman in need appeared) as I got the seat during the last leg of my journey. I got to my workplace only to realize that I had left my key at home but, instead of calling everyone with the key to hurry to the workplace, I waited it out. This new feeling of calm is elevating, Im worried for nothing and this maybe the first time in my entire life that Im worried for nothing. No, doors need to be locked, no switches need to be turned off, no deadlines to meet and no love to greet. There is a profound happiness that...

Welcome back to another one of my gab fests! How have you all been all this time?          I was wondering about something very banal not, because I'm incapable of having complex thoughts but, rather because it was so common and disinteresting that it kept popping up. So, the topic of our discussion today is (yep, you got that right from the title itself). So, being a citizen of a metropolitan city like Delhi, it is very common  for me to see quarrels, people are fighting on roads, the traffic jams are the culprits, in the air so polluted the smog is the culprit and so on. Fighting is something very constant those who dont seem to be fighting have other conflicts to tend to.        Therefore, the quarrel I am to address is the one that we dont see, coz what we see is just too petty for me to give my thoughts on. The quarrel within refers to the conflicting opinions of the heart and the mind, this confusion was made evident to me n...

https://youtu.be/e6LguBkaX7E

How easy it seems sometimes, to hold out a smile, to tell someone that you care for them! I was pacing up and down on the rooftop, under the negligible wind and dimly lit sky, hoping for it to rain. Something came along a thought clinging to the so called 'Train of Thought', I remembered once a conversation with someone, and her exact words were, "you see me smile naa but, have you seen my eyes?" Perhaps since, that day I realized that you gotta keep the happy eyes with you, or someone will call your bluff. So, when is it that you fail to see someone else's eyes ? Thats when your own eyes are sad and that was the shortcoming of it all. Call me judgemental, I say we all are. You think you are any different, I beg to differ, did you not judge first in-order to let in more information because even when you are just being procrastinating about another, you are constantly judging, its just that your judgement is changing like the fool's. This judgment is somet...

Something I have learned long back is that LOVE is the only son of a dog (coz I'm feminist), that can drive me to write about something. Rest all I am capable of keeping in. You got that right, yes, it is that time again when I am feeling infatuation, a beautiful someone is seemingly more beautiful than the rest of them. I met her not at some party, bar, club, or disco (i don't go to any of those....... maybe once in a while), no, I met her at a college. Sometimes it's downright funny as to the chain of unforeseen events lead to such happy yet painful accidents. We started a conversation very prior to the scheduled time of discussion and by the end of the day which we both were crawling through (although in different teams), we were friends enough to exchange contacts and all (coz well, let's face it I'm charming, love). Now since that chance meeting, we have met each other a couple of times and I like the time I spend with her and on top of that she is f...