Happy today- something is different well,then comes the "Personal Influence Theory" into play . I just remembered that, yesterday evening it was 2 friends teasing me about Her. I guess the influence of their meaningless and vain chatter has set in. Since morning i am listening to the heart warming, life affirming and stupid love songs, to be honest its just one in particular "Ishq Bulava" an OST of Bollywood movie "Hasee Toh Phasee". A movie in which the leading hero falls for his fiancee's sister who was banished from the family. So I guess the concept of 'Forbidden Love' is in motion here. Trust me im not the kind to fight even for my limitations. It so happened during the class that our lecturer was teaching and I out of habit of being an insufferable know it all completed his sentence with a peculiar word "BELOVED" while it was to be friends and colleagues (i so wanted to shoot myself that i uttered something and that too under the influence of love or just a feeling of it). Another anomaly I noticed that, I haven't been bitten by a vampire, werewolf or radio-active insects lately (trust me i checked) but, i dont see myself as the same old Mohit rather, I see myself as a strong and responsible person, someone strong enough to protect her and responsible enough to hold her. I have started to feel good about this feeling (earlier it was just a lot of self loathing) and I know why it is so. It is because those 2 idiots taunted me a lot about me not changing relationships and frankly speaking, it doesn't matter much to me. I have witnessed the feeling of making people cry, making loved ones cry and im not ready to make Her cry ever.
Today I had an unusual air of calm inside my lungs. Today I was in no hurry to get up and go to work, I knew that sleeping in 30 minutes more wont hurt anybody, I walked to the Metro train station in a long 10 minute walk (it takes me precisely 7 minutes to get to the station from my home) and i was fine, not put of breath in any way, I was subjected to the same unrelenting crowd of rajiv chowk and I didnt care. In the metro I didnt offer my seat to any (coz no one aged nor any woman in need appeared) as I got the seat during the last leg of my journey. I got to my workplace only to realize that I had left my key at home but, instead of calling everyone with the key to hurry to the workplace, I waited it out. This new feeling of calm is elevating, Im worried for nothing and this maybe the first time in my entire life that Im worried for nothing. No, doors need to be locked, no switches need to be turned off, no deadlines to meet and no love to greet. There is a profound happiness that...
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