Skip to main content

Pain Beneath a Smile

Its a Wednesday evening like any other...but today something stuck  me.. a kick to the piniata full of old memories .. these memories i cherished ...i was proud of these memories and the characters who played part in this colorful play of life ...laughing alongside my happiness , crying for my sorrows and loving their love, keeping me as a shoulder to cry on, a firm hand to push on and a friend in need...im still proud of them .. but like any other pain .. i now want to forget what they once meant to me ... what they felt for me, and what i felt for them... We bump into new people everyday.. its not news... but its only a few who manage to touch our hearts...some pretended to b enemies and some pretended to b friends...some turn their faces away when i say "hey"
some pass by like a ghost  without even a gentle nod...some forgot me and my existence ..a new world and a new home is where i live .. send me a letter and i will forgive.. but u dont seem to care ... i was blind not to see ..wat was this friendship of urs to me...some still come back ..
Made recently but bonded tightly , an old friend  who no matter wat happnes remembers that i am a part of his lyf.....some new friends who help me smile...some who stay for a while ...listen to me when i talk ,reply to every hey as i walk past them or towards them ... they welcome me, with smiles and joys .. same way like u guys did..i guess i wont know if their friendship is worth giving a try...i guess i have to wait for the time to come by...i wish i had friends half the friend i was to them ...they r now my past for they forgot me like one..its not that i am angry  .. but i feel pity on my self ...i was childish enough to let my self think that u were an important character in this play of life..i still have words to say ... i still have some courtesies to pay...i wished i could express it all.. for i am short on words freinds .. people say that ur friends are more lyk ur brothers and sisters..i regret it ..i can say now that i have a brother who is more caring than a friend and friends who care for me as a brother...thnx guys  
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Happy Happy Calm

Today I had an unusual air of calm inside my lungs. Today I was in no hurry to get up and go to work, I knew that sleeping in 30 minutes more wont hurt anybody, I walked to the Metro train station in a long 10 minute walk (it takes me precisely 7 minutes to get to the station from my home) and i was fine, not put of breath in any way, I was subjected to the same unrelenting crowd of rajiv chowk and I didnt care. In the metro I didnt offer my seat to any (coz no one aged nor any woman in need appeared) as I got the seat during the last leg of my journey. I got to my workplace only to realize that I had left my key at home but, instead of calling everyone with the key to hurry to the workplace, I waited it out. This new feeling of calm is elevating, Im worried for nothing and this maybe the first time in my entire life that Im worried for nothing. No, doors need to be locked, no switches need to be turned off, no deadlines to meet and no love to greet. There is a profound happiness that...
Post a Comment
Read more

The Narcissist

heyo ... Perhaps i was wrong ... maybe this need to write just doesnt thrive on the feeling of love or any such problem ... its just the feeling of being that makes me write these notes ... so been sometime since i have been told by an astrologer that i will be sensitive (emotionally) for 10 years , long time .. well 2010 was the beginning of it and 2020 will be the supposed end of it .. so been thinking on how can i become emotional all of a sudden .. and then it hit me .. i have been writing since 2010 only , been noticing little details since then only ..  so conclusion i twisted something in order to fit something ... but yea while the topic is at hand i suddenly lack empathy for others and started taking care of my own self ..  i supposedly won "the most compassionate Mira-ite" award (i saw the name on the trophy just a few weeks back and got it that it was a title given to me only .. although i have no memory of getting it ).. so that com...
Post a Comment
Read more

Contentment

its been quite some time since something struck this head of mine ..and  thought i should express this one thought that has been just strolling in my extremely excited brain it started about 4 days back . its is pretty humane to feel a rush of excitement and i am quite human so i get excited a lot . I remember that when i was a kid we used to travel to Punjab in trains and no matter how bad the ride was gonna be (i ended up sick after most of em ) but i was never able to sleep the night before the journey . The path was always the same old monotonous one and so was the interior but, it never thwarted that excitement . Gradually i became older and lost this excitement . There are always some feelings in life which are forgotten because they get suppressed to extreme . Exempli gratia that feeling of enjoying a lolly pop .. how many of you readers remember it ... ?                ...
Post a Comment
Read more